Thursday, Jan. 22, 2004
Let them know
Upon reading some other diaries, I have come to realize that sometimes though I don’t mean to I have taken the best things for granted. I have always said how lucky I have been to have found a person so caring and understanding as my husband, but sometimes, I guess I let my temper get the best of me and I tend to snap at my husband when I don’t really think he deserves it. And when you have lived through the things that he and I have been through, you suddenly get this feeling that you shouldn’t stay angry… for me personally, I am scared senseless that I may never see him again and I wont get a chance to say I am sorry or that I love him. I have found that this is a feeling that lives inside me daily. I am forever scared that he will suddenly be taken away from me, gone away as fast as he came into my life.
I think maybe the reason I am writing this today is because somehow I want to say that regardless of the times I snap at him, or the petty arguments my husband has become my world. I live to make him happy and to bring joy to his life, I wake up every morning wanting to give him hope, continue to give him hope that this time he will be happy forever, that we will grow old together, that we will have eternity together.
The day my husband proposed to me, I was so happy and excited that I didn’t even think about the lifetime commitment I was saying yes to. I don’t really think I noticed until after we were married and living together. Yet day-to-day I wake up and I feel that I am more committed and more in love than the day before. I may not always agree with the way he does things, but this never makes me not like him. Not many people realize that you can love someone but not like the person they are.
I guess in all this I am saying that I am happy I made the commitment of living my life with my husband; I love him dearly and cannot picture my life without him. I am blessed with the type of husband who understands when I am simply not in the mood to cook, he helps out with cleaning the house and if it were up to him, he would do it all by himself, after dinner he helps with the dishes and waits for me before starting to watch TV. But on the most important aspects of our relationship, my husband is understanding, he is patient, he allows me to cry when I need to and understands my need to, he looks out for my well being and lets me know that no matter how I feel, he will always love me, he makes me laugh and what’s more he laughs at my jokes and has told me that he couldn’t live without my sense of humor. All in all I am extremely happy and what I most look forward to in life is making him just as happy. I want to continue to make him laugh and be his sunshine forever.
I am truly blessed in having found him. If you are as lucky as I am to have someone love you and respect you, someone cherish you and never under estimate you, let them know you are happy, tell them you love them and that you are proud of the person they are, tell them you are a better person since you have them in your life. Don’t let the opportunity pass you by. I try to do this everyday; in the end it is all that matters.
r-y-r at 11:05 AM
